The last couple of weeks have been pretty big for me. I recently turned 50, YAY ME! It was the perfect time to resolve to come to terms with my retirement, (I announced it to every one), come out of my shell a bit more, focused on healing and in turn plot a clearer path to help others.
A major part of healing for me I believe lies in helping others who are facing the same types of difficulties and those who have no idea what we live with understand a bit more about why we are “JFU” (just fu&#%d up). While I am in no position to speak for any one, and there are as many different stories of First Responder PTSD/PTSI as there are people dealing with it, I do understand so much more than two years ago and know there have to be a multitude of people who were just like me and just don’t get what happened to them or why.
I was asked to be involved with a new group starting at my college (Mendocino College) focused on healing though art. I was super honored and excited! Hopefully, it will bring some peace of mind and a new form of expression to people dealing with the “gift that keeps on giving”. I will be posting some of my art work in a new catagory here, and hopefully will have a bit to choose from for the art show in early fall 2016 to kick off the new group.
I am going to have my second manuscript, the first chapter of my PTSI story, critiqued tomorrow in Creative Writing English class. Kinda nervous about that one but also can’t wait to get feed back from 20 people. I edited it twice and still found a few mistakes! Thinking about real incidents and the nightmares, smells and thoughts associated with PTSD on an in depth scale was nothing like I expected. I really hope it is well received and I can take it to a new level in the near future.
More soon, cheers!